Summer is approaching and families are making vacation plans. If you’re a dad of young kids like me, the thought of an ambitious road trip or elaborate vacation to an exotic locale might sound stressful. From screaming toddlers in the backseat to incessant “are we there yet?” impatience, interrupted sleep schedules, emergency potty stops, and all manner of other chaos, you might think a daring family travel adventure is unwise and not worth it. I’d challenge you to reconsider.
My wife and I traveled the world prior to having kids and loved the freedoms afforded by our (short) DINK lifestage. Honestly, we were somewhat worried that the transition to parenting young kids would bring our adventurous travel to a screeching halt. Thankfully, although it has certainly changed the way we travel, it hasn’t stopped it entirely. In some ways, the wildness of trips with young kids has made it even more meaningful. With children under the age of five we have traveled internationally (France, New Zealand, Colombia, Canada), enjoyed epic trips in the National Parks (Yellowstone, Grand Teton, Zion, Bryce, Acadia, Everglades), and schlepped three kids, three carseats, multiple pack-n-plays, and multiple suitcases on airplanes multiple times. Has it been easy? No. Are we crazy for doing it? Maybe. Has it been worth it? Absolutely. Every time.
As someone whose life has been powerfully shaped by travel, from childhood to adulthood, I’m a big believer that the investment pays off—not only for the rest a vacation affords, but for the expanded horizons, kindled curiosity, and forged memories such experiences catalyze. The temporary stresses of travel with kids (and the financial investment!) are a small price to pay for the developmental gain and even spiritual formation such trips can provide.
So as you consider what formative travel experience you might curate for your young family this summer (or beyond), here are some tips that might help with the daunting logistics. These are lessons we’ve learned over the last five years: hacks which have made travel with kids not only possible, but pleasurable.
1. Plan as much in advance as you can plan. One of my greatest leisure-time pleasures in life is meticulously crafting trip itineraries: creating very specific itineraries for upcoming trips, down to each meal and even afternoon coffee stops. I do realize this is nerdy and not everyone’s cup of tea. But whatever itinerary-planning you have time to do, do it. Not only is it fun to sort of extend the pleasure of your vacation through months of anticipation, but it’s practical. Traveling with kids is exhausting and stressful. You don’t want to add to the stress by having the daily burden of deciding/debating the “plan” for the day, on the fly. There will be enough that is unpredictable and improvisational about the trip. Eliminate some uncertainty by having a good plan in advance.
2. Be realistic about the itinerary and build in “open” time. Kids slow you down. Embrace this as a good thing! Don't overstuff your itinerary with more than your family can bear. Pick one or two sites/activities each day—ideally grouped in the same geographical area, to minimize travel time—and be OK not seeing everything. Every couple days, plan a free afternoon or even a free day to explore whatever seems of interest. But maybe have a few options lined up in advance, so it’s not a total free-for-all.
3. Plan times for naps! This is one of crucial keys to success when we travel with our three kids (who all still nap). No matter how much it pains you to return to your accomodations from being out-and-about, just so the kids can nap, trust me: everyone will be happier for it. Some days it’s not possible, if it’s a long driving day or a daytrip somewhere. But whenever possible, plan an activity in the morning, then a break for midday naps, then do something in the afternoon/evening. Naptime is a win for parents too... You’ll need quiet moments of rest too!
4. Stay in Airbnbs or cabin rentals, not hotels. Hotels are doable with one kid, but once you have two or more, it becomes unrealistic to squish into one hotel room. For one thing, napping kids is hard to do when everyone is in the same room. We prefer to stay in Airbnbs or multiple-bedroom cabin rentals when we travel, so that the kids can sleep in different rooms from us (and if possible, from each other). Hotels also tend to be more expensive and inconvenient for meals, since most hotels don’t have amenities for cooking your own meals in the room. With short-term rentals, you have a fully equipped kitchen at your disposal. Get groceries on your first day (plan your meals in advance to know the exact groceries you’ll need to buy) and boom—you won’t have to eat many meals in restaurants if you don't want to.
5. Pick restaurants strategically. If you do plan to eat meals out during your trip, I advise spending time researching, selecting, and even making reservations at as many as you can in advance. Again, this pre-work will save you the stress of wasting time scrolling through Yelp or TripAdvisor during your precious vacation time. This principle is even more important with kids, because you’ll want to select kid-friendly restaurants that have kids menus. But have no fear, foodies. Even if you won’t be able to dine at the nearest Michelin-starred hotspot when you’re traveling with kiddos, there’s still good food to find in family-friendly settings. I find craft breweries to be a good option. Most of them have quality, ”elevated comfort food“ menus that include good options for little eaters.
6. Allocate plenty of time for the airport—but not too much time. If you’re flying with young kids, you’ll need to arrive at the airport about an hour earlier than you would normally arrive for a flight. Unloading all your loot, checking bags/strollers/pack-n-plays, etc. takes a decent amount of time. Check all the bags you can so you’re not juggling much more than your children on the actual flight. But don’t arrive so early at the airport that you end up having to kill long hours with your children. Airports are the last place you want to be with antsy and over-stimulated children.
7. Contain the kids in the airport. Busy airports can be highly stressful if you’re trying to corral active, restless kids. So think through what apparatus options you have for containing them. When my wife and I travel with our three kids, we have our double stroller with us in the airport for two of them, with the littlest one carried in the Baby Bjorn. The stroller can be gate-checked when you board the plane, and then picked up gate-side when you land.
8. Invest in TSA-precheck or similar programs. It’s worth it for saving time and hassle in security lines. Going through security with multiple young children is peak stress, so make it simpler by paying in advance for a Trusted Traveler program.
9. Snacks! Whether on long plane flights or long car rides, a well-stocked snack bag is a must! Pro tip: If you’re flying, avoid extra bulk by packing only as many snacks as you’ll need for the first travel day. Go to a grocery store when you land and re-stock as needed.
10. Think carefully about ground transport. If you fly somewhere for your vacation, depending on where you’re headed, you’ll have different ground transportation options. The easiest with kids is certainly car rental (make sure you reserve a large enough car for all your kids and luggage), though this is also expensive and can be stressful in certain contexts (foreign countries, busy cities). If you’re headed to a big city like New York or London and will be staying in one place within the city, for the whole trip, you may be able to get away with some combination of subways, trains, and Ubers (especially if you’re out of the car-seat stage). We took Chet to Paris for a week when he was a baby and managed to do it without a rental car. But navigating the subway with his stroller—or Ubers with his carseat—was tricky! These days our trips pretty much always involve a large vehicle—either our own (if it’s a trip within driving distance) or a rental.
11. Plan your itinerary to strategically minimize drive-times. Let’s say you’re planning a two-week family trip to Iceland, renting a van and hoping to see all the major sites. That’s doable! Iceland basically has one big ring road that circles the entire country, and whether you go clockwise or counter-clockwise, the key is selecting accommodations that break up the trip in doable chunks—with (ideally) no drive longer than four or five hours. This coming summer we are spending a few weeks in Colorado, splitting the time between different Airbnbs in different regions of the state. We organized it so that each “transition” day requires no more than four hours in the car. Minimizing car time for everyone’s sanity is key to a successful family trip!
12. Create a trip playlist! This may be another nerdy thing that I do and no one else does, but the playlists I’ve created for our recent family trips—Canadian Rockies, The American West—have created memorable aesthetic ambience for our car time together, with songs we’ll now forever associate with special family memories. Plus, soothing music in the car can help replenish the souls of a stressed-out driving dad and exhausted mom :)
13. Pack as lightly as you possibly can. I realize this is easier said than done with kids, but some tips to consider here include:
Stay in Airbnbs with washer/dryers for your laundry. This will mean you can cut your clothes packing in half (at least).
Choose Airbnbs that have existing baby gear provided (high chairs, pack-n-plays, baby gates, etc.)
Some popular beach destinations (or other tourist spots) have baby-gear rental companies where you can rent bulky things you’d rather than take on a plane (everything from pack-n-plays and strollers to beach tents and sand toys).
Diapers take up huge space in your baggage, so consider bringing only what you need for the first day or so, and then buying a box of diapers at a store once you arrive.
14. Prioritize activities that build core memories and cultivate wonder. My greatest joy in planning ambitious trips for my family is the thought that I’m instilling in my kids a curiosity and awe at the wonders of God’s world—as well as curating experiences that they’ll remember forever. This means going big and taking risks! Walk on glaciers. Wait for a geyser eruption. Hike with the kids to the foot of a roaring waterfall and get soaked. Walk on a terrifying high suspension bridge (we did this one with our kids last summer). Search for wildlife. Hike together in bear country (bring bear spray!). Take a gondola to the top of a mountain. Ride a raft or float on a tube down a river. Go on a lake cruise. Attend a kid-friendly concert or dinner theater. Build your own walking tour of a historic city center. Find playgrounds and parks and let the kids explore. Get out there and have fun!
15. Learn as you go. Each trip you take will reveal things that work or don’t work for your family. Not all of the tips above will work for you. You’ll learn your own travel hacks. Over time, you’ll get a sense for what sorts of destinations, experiences, and pace fit your family best. Embrace your limitations but also push them. Share a joyful experience together. Make memories!